Bridging Your Children’s Communications Gap in a Digital Era By Jane Genova


In 1995, psychologist Daniel Goleman stunned parents. He told them their children’s success in work and in life depended more on their Emotional Intelligence (EI) than their Cognitive IQ.

A major part of EI is communications know-how. The immediate challenge for your children is this: Their reliance on digital devices can limit their ability to listen, have a face-to-face conversation, and read non-verbal cues. Here are three tips how you can help them bridge that gap.

Know You Are Setting the Example. From the time we exit the womb, we learn how to navigate the world by imitation. That means that your children are internalizing how to interact by observing you. Therefore, no matter what you might be feeling at the time or how tired you are, the burden is on you to set the example. That’s the model they will follow in formal situations, ranging from school to applying for their first job.

Make Listening Fun. Part of the epidemic of short attention spans is the lost art of listening. Many parents complain children are too consumed in their little worlds to even hear, “It’s dinner time” or “The school bus is here.” One way to break through this compulsion is to make listening a game. Material for this ranges from commercial films to simply overhearing conversations. Have contests about identifying the messaging, who’s getting it and who’s missing it. Your children can post on social networks or blogs their ah-ha moments. They can also publish an e-book. Explain how this could lead to fame.

Unleash the Dramatic. It’s by acting out all the wrong facial gestures and body language that your children will get down cold what not to do. Organize neighborhood mini theatrical productions featuring these lessons. Post the photos and videos on social networks. Who knows, maybe a talent scout will spot your children’s talent.

In the process of passing on superior communications skills to children, you are bound to raise the bar for your own. Do not be surprised if good things start happening. Those could be a promotion in work or being elected to head a parents’ organization.

Jane Genova (

Bridging Your Children’s Communications Gap in a Digital Era By Jane Genova

Do You Know About TBH – (To Be Honest) Rates? by Melissa Anthony

TBH & Rates have been around for a while. So, for those of you, not new to the social media craziness, “no, I didn’t just find out about this, I just thought we should let others into our inner circle of knowledge.” That being said, and solidifying my, “in the know” status, let’s get on with explaining.

TBH, is the acronym for, To Be Honest rates, means you rate someone’s picture, from 1-10. Since this generation is all about meeting new people through people they know on social media, this is a normal practice.

Regular comments on a selfie tagged, TBH & Rates are; “TBH you are so cute, I think we should hang out 10” and “TBH I don’t know you but you look like such a fun person, hmu 8”. Do you see how this works? Of course, there can be negative comments as well.

The biggest problem I have with with TBH & Rates (I have a long list, but importantly), this is just another form of that focus. Girls worry about how many likes they get on a pic or how many views and now rates? Body shaming and messaging this way is rampant on Twitter.

Social media makes it even worse because they cannot escape it. We can tell them that TBH & RATES don’t matter though. We can reinforce beauty everyday and remind them that, daily, they grow a little more, and not to give other people the power to decide whether they are beautiful or not. Learning that goes a long way, from self esteem, to relationships. It’s always nice to receive a compliment and it’s great to give them as well. TBH & Rates is not the way to achieve it though.

My Social Sitter is a way for parents to know if their child is sending TBH messaging that is just not “honest” but mean and considered bullying.

Do You Know About TBH – (To Be Honest) Rates? by Melissa Anthony